Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Shameful Secrets

Come on; you know we all have them. In addition to being Disney Dorks, I mean. There are things about Walt Disney World that we are ashamed to admit we like, even to other Disney fans. There are also things we don’t particularly care for but are reluctant to criticize, for fear we will be painted with the Disney heresy brush. I, however, can’t take the confines of my Disney closet any longer and am coming out. Deep breath; here we go:

I love the Country Bear Jamboree. I love nearly everything about it; the holding area where you wait for the show (the claw marks in the floor completely convinced me as a child that these were real bears), the theater, the songs, and the critters themselves. I sing along with every song (and not quietly, either). I cry when I leave. I was furious when they did the Vacation Hoedown makeover, and cheered upon the return of the original show. I don’t even like it when the Christmas overlay contaminates my beloved bears. I remember when there used to be a lot of CBJ merchandise (I will not start ranting about the homogenization of Disney merchandise here, however badly I want to) and I would give just about anything for a great big stuffed Country Bear of my own (Henry with Sammy wrapped around his hat would be awesome). Go ahead and laugh; you know you want to.

On the other hand, I’m not a big fan of the WDW parades. Well, the daytime ones, anyway. Spectromagic (or the Main Street Electrical Parade, or whatever its current incarnation) is pretty cool, but never seems to be running when I visit. I consider the parades a great time to go ride attractions because the lines will be shorter, but the hassle of navigating around them to get through the park goes a long way to canceling this benefit out, in my mind. I did like Mickey’s Jammin’ Jungle Parade the time I was in it however. That was sweet.

I never had a Dole Whip until I was in my 30’s. Now I just adore them.

I could take or leave Mission: Space and Test Track. They were interesting enough the first couple of times I rode them, but they just don’t have the repeatability factor that I want out of an E-Ticket attraction. To quote evil Willow (for all of you Buffy the Vampire Slayer fans): “Bored now”.

I want to like the films in the countries around World Showcase; I really do. I feel as though if I were truly worldly and cosmopolitan, these would appeal to me. Truth be told though, they remind me of the films we’d watch in high school Geography class. While those are great for getting out of class, they aren’t want I want to see on vacation. World Showcase needs some decent attractions!

I can’t walk down Main Street USA without skipping. And crying. And singing. Loudly, I might add.

I love Fantasmic, but I can’t stand the wait to see it, and the crowds when leaving. Now that Disney has reduced the number of performances, these issues have escalated to the point that I generally just don’t bother with the hassle anymore. This makes me angry with Disney. (I can’t believe I just said that.)

Other than Dinosaur, I don’t like Dinoland USA at all. I get that they were going for a theme, and I’ve heard the quote from the Imagineers; “Do you know how much it cost to make it look so cheap and tacky?” My response is: “Yes, but why would you want to?”

It drives me nuts to hear people make Disney mistakes. It’s Cinderella Castle, not Cinderella’s Castle. The Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Disney’s Hollywood Studios and Animal Kingdom are all part of WDW; Universal and Islands of Adventure are not. You cannot monorail from the All Star Resorts to the Magic Kingdom. My husband sometimes has to physically restrain me from berating – er, I mean correcting guests who say these things.

My final secret: there are things at WDW that I’ve never done. And not just new stuff, either. I’ve never been to Tom Sawyer Island. I’ve never seen Cirque du Soleil. I’ve never eaten at a lot of the better Disney restaurants. I guess this just gives me a reason to go back!

Okay, I’ve fessed up. Now it’s your turn. What are your shameful Disney secrets?

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  1. Spectromagic is my favorite parade on the face of the planet. I always scramble to see it, dragging those in my party away from things they'd rather be doing, and I always insist on seeing it both times it runs in a day (once as darkness falls, and again just before closing and the fireworks above Cinderella Castle). My eyes often fill with tears as the epic theme sweeps the streets of the Magic Kingdom in its various manifestations, and especially as the parade ends and Jiminy Cricket in his glowing white coat and hat waves at me and the music fills my heart one last time. I just completely geeked out, but I really think that parade is my single favorite thing about WDW.

    Also, I hate "it's a small world." I will not go near it much less ride it, and I flare up at those around me who begin to sing the song (because they often do just to get under my skin). That said, as I write this the song has become firmly lodged in my head.

  2. I can't believe I'm admitting this, esp. in Disney circles but... I like Sounds Dangerous at DHS.

  3. I dont watch the parades, I think they waste valuable ride time. I'm indifferent on Splash Mountain, and have only ridden Dumbo 1 time.

  4. After four times to WDW over the past three years of knowing my husband, he finally got me to ride Tower of Terror in January.

    I had a panic attack and started sobbing the minute we had the first drop. I don't know if I'll go back again.

  5. I went to Disneyland for the first time two years ago, and was completely alone. I stood there looking at the entryway and cried, much to the confusion of those around me all scrambling to enter. I wandered the parks eating a caramel apple and didn't care that I was perhaps the biggest loser at the park.

  6. Sorry, but I love the Country Bears' Xmas and Vacation shows and would love to see all 3 incarnations of the show rotate annually again (Tokyo Disneyland's Country Bear attraction does an all-3-shows rotation and WDW should do the same, IMO).

    Those overlays are not "contaminations" at all! That bit of wording was overly-harsh.

  7. I have been to WDW about 7 times including 3 as an adult and have never had a Dole Whip, Schoolbread, or even been in the Main Street Bakery.